Only Silence Remains

A groan of tedium escapes me,
Startling the fearful.
Is this a test? It has to be,
Otherwise I can't go on.
Draining patience, drain vitality.
This paranoid, paralyzed vampire act's a little old.

But I'm still right here
Giving blood, keeping faith
And I'm still right here.

Wait it out,
Gonna wait it out,
Be patient (wait it out).

If there were no reward to (reap / heal),
(No / A) loving embrace to see me through
This tedious path I've chosen here,
I certainly would've walked away by now.
Gonna wait it out.

If there were no desire to heal
A damaged and broken man along
This tedious path I've chosen here
I certainly would've walked away by now.

And I still may ... [sigh] ... I still may.

Be patient.
I must keep reminding myself of this.

And if there were no rewards to (reap / heal),
(No / A) loving embrace to see me through
This tedious path I've chosen here,
I certainly would've walked away by now.
And I still may.

Gonna wait it out.

-Tool, "The Patient"


This one has a bit more emotion than some of my regular pieces. It was inspired by two different close friends and two different but somewhat similar situations where I wasn't sure whether to feel blown off, or just the usual disappointed. Sometimes there's only so much you can give. Sometimes you have to step back and let people heal or deal with life, and sometimes that means they break their promises… but if it means they get their life in order or improve it somehow, I guess I can swallow my disappointment… But I should know better than to get my hopes up by now. Read into it what you will, I think the song describes my mood for the painting well enough.

Watermarks sssssuuuuuck, but unfortunately they're necessary. This took faaaarrrr too long and I can still pick out two dozen mistakes, but I learned a lot doing this one. I know a few things now that will make it easier for next time I try a piece like this. And next time, remind me to not try and draw dreadlocks.